éirímis

I tried to type the fault in our stars,

Ended up autocorrecting to the gilt on our stats.

…I think I like it.

Once upon a time,

There was a princess named Kathryn of Tumblria.

Princess Kathryn liked to spend her days in pretty dresses and eating food with copious amounts of icing and sprinkles. As well as incorporating as much glitter into the land of Tumblria as possible.

The land of tumblria was a peaceful place, occasionally small skirmishes would break out, but they were quickly dealt with by the power of amusing gifs.

However there was an evil power lurking in Tumblria, it quietly hid in the shadows, waiting of the most opportune moment to strike. Princess Kathryn was unaware of this evil though, so daily she would travel out into the lands, visiting the people of Tumblria and sharing her love of sparkly things.

One day though while Princess Kathryn was out visiting the ponies of Tumblria she could sense that something was wrong. Her people weren’t around, their proclamations were few and far between.

She looked all over for them, but no one seemed to be around. She feared that something terrible had happened to her beloved subjects. The more that she searched the more apparent it became that there was something seriously wrong.

Princess Kathryn wasn’t about to give up on her Tumblrians though, so she quickly tried to send out a message to her followers.

It was then that she saw what was causing all the fuss. As she tried to write her message the evil Lord Tumbeast appeared!

“How dare you disturb my slumber!” He cried. “I now rule this land! There will be no more merriment, or music, or memes! Only homework, facebook, and chores!”

Princess Kathryn nearly fainted at the thought of how terrible that sort of world would be. She managed to keep her composure though, and remember what the King and Queen of Tumblria had taught her about defending the kingdom.

“Begone foul beast!” She hoped that her voice didn’t sound as scared as she felt inside. “The land of Tumblria is a beautiful place, shame on you for trying to destroy everything that makes it special!”

The evil Lord Tumbeast let out a menacing laugh. “Who is it that dare defy me? I shall cage you like I’ve caged all the others, they are locked out! Unable to waste time in this silly place!”

“I am Princess Kathryn of Tumblria, and I demand that you release my followers at once, and leave this land never to come back!” She held her ground, her voice stronger now that she was certain that she could defeat the evil Lord Tumbeast.

“I dare you to make me!” he yelled back, a smile playing on his lips. Princess Kathryn could tell that he underestimated her, but she had a secret weapon, one that she never left her castle without.

“Behold!” She cried, pulling out the sword of f5. It had been quite hidden in the many layers of chiffon in the skirt she was wearing. “How foolish you are to think that this kingdom would be unguarded against your evil ways! I hold the sword of f5 and I will wield it for weeks if I have to in order to restore my kingdom to order! I dare you to challenge me again!”

The evil Lord Tumbeast had heard of the sword of f5, Mama Tumbeast had warned him of it when he was but a baby Tumbeast, not yet big enough to wreck havoc on the masses. It had power enough to defeat even the biggest King Tumbeast, his Mama had warned.

And so, while the evil Lord Tumbeast was evil, even he could not stand against the sword of f5. So he tucked his tail in between his legs and started plotting the destruction of the land of myspacia.

lol I totally forgot to mention this

because really it’s not that important or vital knowledge for your everyday life but guess who got bumpits as a joke gift for Christmas?

Me!

and by golly my hair will never look unfabulous again.